One mom + another mom = Not much for Mother’s Day

I need a plan for Mother’s Day. I know what you’re thinking. It’s a little late. And it’s true. It’s a little late for this year. But c’mon people, when I plan ahead, I really plan ahead. What are you doing for Christmas 2015? What? You don’t know!

Actually, this is just my clever and defensive way of not dealing with the fact that I think I missed an opportunity here. Having two moms in our house caused this event to cancel itself out, sort of like Quaaludes and cocaine. Oooops, sorry, my 80s was showing. But Mother’s Day at our house was an oxymoron, when it should have been twice as much fun.

But if we want to get really truthy, I find Mother’s Day mildly irritating, partly because it comes on the heals of tons of other family holidays, and I’m actually sick of cake, which seems entirely implausible. But mostly I have ignored Mother’s Day because it’s sort of trapped in it’s gender identity. Mother’s Day has to be all nice and flowery and unobtrusive. It was so understated this year that I completely forgot about it until about three days before. C’mon Mother’s Day Lean In! You need to stand up with your protest sign, your loud voice and get your Hillary-Betty-Gloria on.

So what did we do? Not much. We went to grandma’s house, ate chili and beans and ran around in the sprinkler naked. I skipped the last part, in case you’re wondering. As did grandma. I looked up Mother’s Day on Wikipedia to see if there was any truth to the story that the day was started as a day of protest by mothers who didn’t want their sons to die in wars. It’s not. It’s a holiday “honoring mothers, and motherhood, maternal bonds, and the influence of mothers in society.”

You would think that would be good enough for me. And it is. I was honored in a nice, flowery and unobtrusive way, by just treating it like any other day that it was great to be alive and have a family in my own home at peace.


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