A short family history, in case you have questions

If you are wondering how exactly things got this way, here is a diagram. Or if you are not a big reader. Or if you had questions, but you were too afraid to ask. Or you are just catching up. Or you just “don’t get it.” I’ve tried to simplify it as best as possible. Here is what has happened in the last few years.

gay family

I hate how fat I look in a couple of those shots. And if you have questions, feel free to ask. You won’t be the first. But you might need to buy me a drink. Or at least invite me to a cocktail party, first.

Follow this and a lot more on Facebook: www.facebook.com/sevenlittlemexicans 
Or find us on Twitter @7littlemexicans and #7LM
Follow my blog with Bloglovin

PS – here we are in non-stick form:

familyphoto

 

© Sarah Ann Gilbert and Seven Little Mexicans, 2014. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Sarah Ann Gilbert and Seven Little Mexicans with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

We’re not gay enough or something. So maybe I’ll just punch myself in the head.

I got a phone call on Monday from a guy named Andrew which is awesome, because I love phone calls. Andrew is the casting producer for Punched in the Head Productions, a film company that makes “not-so-serious” productions. This phone call was even better than I expected, because he wasn’t actually planning on punching me in the head, which is good because that would be serious, and these folks are supposed to be “not-so-serious.” And I’m not-so-serious, so I knew Andrew and I would hit it off.

Andrew was trolling the internet looking for LGBT families to cast on a new show on Bravo, and he found my blog. So he called me. And it was great. Except that the show he is casting for is called “Bravo’s Extreme Guide to Parenting,” and we couldn’t come up with anything extreme about my family. Maybe that was extremely lazy of us, but not lazy enough to be on TV. And we talked a little bit about how gay my family is, but it’s not THAT gay. I’m not sure what that means, but being gay and having two kids is no longer extreme, so that was great news. And I won’t have to wash my hair and lose 50 pounds, so I’ll look good on TV. So that’s a big relief. And now I’ve got a new friend on Facebook, which is always awesome! And he’s in a relationship with someone named Gilbert, which gets extra bonus points in my book because that’s kind of gay and because his boyfriend’s name is Gilbert.

So, if you live in a cave with your bisexual, transgendered lover and your triplets that you are raising to be Evangelical Muslims, while you wear nothing but fur and hunt for your own food using weapons recreated from The Hunger Games movie, then you might want to give Andrew a call. He’s looking for you.

Andrew Hecht
917-838-3571

punchedinhead

Follow this and a lot more on Facebook: www.facebook.com/sevenlittlemexicans 
Or find us on Twitter #7LM and @7littlemexicans

© Sarah Ann Gilbert and Seven Little Mexicans, 2014. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Sarah Ann Gilbert and Seven Little Mexicans with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

What does it mean? The name. Does it really involve Mexicans?

Yes, it does. And now I will explain what the name of this blog means for the millions out there who are reading this, because who wouldn’t want to read about a gay, inter-racial couple having babies. And since a picture is worth a thousand words, here is the picture.

7LM text

And there is a bit more to the story, as I’m sure you can imagine, but this is the internet and I know you are busy. So, if you want the long story, you’ll need to wait for the book. But it you want the short story, it’s in the next paragraph.

We wanted to have a baby. We didn’t have any sperm. (Boohoo!) So we bought some. Doctors put it in me. It didn’t work. So, doctors took the my eggs out of me and put them in a dish. Then, they added the sperm we bought. The sperm was part Mexican. It fertilized seven of the eggs. The end.

Oh, but then I decided to write this blog about it. Making the Mexicans, I mean, and living with two of them, so I needed a URL. There were not that many available because there are a gazillion moms blogging about their children, but not their Mexicans, but whatever. Mommy blogging is a great, unpaid profession so lots of people are doing it.  But I digress. I picked sevenlittlemexicans.com because the following URLs were unavailable: awkwardconversations.com, endlessdiapers.com, upseventimesanight.com. Or maybe that last one was too long, along with makingbabiesthehardway.com.

Anyhow, that’s how we got here. Any questions?

Follow this and a lot more on Facebook: www.facebook.com/sevenlittlemexicans 
Or find us on Twitter #7LM and @7littlemexicans

© Sarah Ann Gilbert and Seven Little Mexicans, 2014. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Sarah Ann Gilbert and Seven Little Mexicans with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

It’s Monday. Time for some Gay Agenda items.

Today’s gay agenda is pretty long and pretty hardcore. In case you’re unaware or were not following the Conservative Christians closely enough in the 90s, this term was invented by such people to describe the acceptance and normalization of homosexuality. Yes, I’m for it! Except that they are against it. But whatever, let’s discuss. Here is my gay agenda for today.

1. Get out of bed. That was kind of hard. I stayed up late a lot this weekend, so that makes it difficult to get up on Monday.

2. Blogging. This is it. Hope you find it to be everything that you hoped for. But let’s remember that we’re looking for activities that are morally reprehensible. And so far, I think the Christians might be OK with this agenda, except for the blogging, possibly. But I’m guessing they are in favor of getting out of bed, ESPECIALLY if you’re getting out of a bed that contains a woman.

3. Eat breakfast, get dressed, get the children dressed, make bed, tidy up house a little, forget my keys, come back for my keys, forget tampons, come back for tampons. All of these things happen at the same time, so they are really just one agenda item.

4. Go and get a mammogram, while spending most of my time on my iPhone answering work  e-mail and catching up on all the puppy pictures that I might have missed on Buzzfeed overnight. Then, hold my breath while my breasts are pressed between two large pieces of Plexiglas and manipulated gently by a soft spoken woman with cold fingertips.

5. Go to work. Answer e-mail. Make PowerPoint presentations. Help people get their job done. Eat broccoli and broiled chicken for lunch with a Diet Coke, generously supplied by my employer. Talk on the phone. Delete some e-mail. And leave at 4:45 sharp to pick my two children up from day care.

6. Make dinner. Watch the kids not eat dinner. Try to insist that they eat dinner. Give up. Watch Team Umizoomi. Read Dora’s Rainy Day (again!) to Marlo and then sing Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star to her while I turn off the lights and close the door to her room. Repeat the same process with Wynn, but substitute the story about the Little Mermaid, no song and no closing of the door.

7. Go downstairs to our bedroom. Collapse next to Pam. Discuss birthday invitations, weird happenings of the day, check e-mail. Then get up, go next door and pick up Wynn’s birthday bike, which is hiding out in our neighbor’s basement. Decorate it. I have no idea how I’m going to do this, so suggestions welcome. And then go upstairs for more collapsing on the bed. And sing Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star to myself before I fall asleep.

Now I realize that this post did contain a few controversial subjects. Breasts, for one. Always controversial. And tampons. Not as controversial, but at some point I’m guessing there were at least a few people opposed to those, even though they have been around for thousands of years.

So feel free to point out anything that might be morally corrupt in this e-mail. Oh, and don’t forget the suggestions about how to wrap up a bike as a birthday present. I’m all ears. But in the meantime, here’s a picture of the birthday girl (Wynn).

birthday girl

Follow this and a lot more on Facebook: www.facebook.com/sevenlittlemexicans 
Or find us on Twitter #7LM and @7littlemexicans

© Sarah Ann Gilbert and Seven Little Mexicans, 2014. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Sarah Ann Gilbert and Seven Little Mexicans with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...